Anti Narcissistic Update

Hello everyone! I just realized that daily updates about my life probably seems a bit narcissistic so I will be cutting out the daily updates and will consistently post on Saturday with you how to random and will only put up updates during the week when I have a really good quick one!

Thank you for dealing with my silly updates and have a great day

Stay Random Randomeers!

If anyone is deeply oppose to this please let me know and I might try and work things out for you!

Saturday 6/18/11 Epic Post!!!!

How to be a psychological pickpocket! (ZOMG ONE OF TYLER'S SIGNATURE TRICKS!?!?!)

Alright imagine for a moment that I told you that you could get your friend to empty his pockets give you all his stuff and forget that he did it? Would you be stoked? maybe even a little skeptical? GET OUT NONBELIEVER!!!! No I'm joking but I am going to teach you how to do it!

Disclaimer: Do not under any circumstances use this to steal stuff from people. That is messed up also it has a clear possibility for failure which would result in you getting your teeth knocked in. So don't be an idiot and just use this for pranks with your friend.

(Before any of that to answer your question from yesterday, yes I did stick a girls hand to the table!)

You will need a friend and a deck of cards.

Step One

Approach your friend and tell him you are going to show him a magic trick.

Step Two

Ask if he has a wallet/cellphone (whichever you desire to take) take out two playing cards hand him one card in exchange for his item and act like you are measuring it with the card. Say "hmm maybe..." and place the item in your pocket.

Step three

tell him to clip both cards in his hand and hold the tightly and that you will make them switch places.

Step four

Start banging his hands together,not to hard, but firmly. ask for a number between one and ten. and shake his hands that many times.

Step five

Say look they changed. He will look confused as they have not changed at this exact moment say "oh sorry forget about it now, let me show you another trick." (you must use those exact words at the moment of confusion.)

Step Six

Proceed to show him another trick with cards which you could find in some of my early blog entries.

Step Seven

Wait for him to be amazed by trick ask if he liked it and walk away with his item. unbenounced to you, I just made you make use of very advanced hypnotic techniques that if done exactly as described here will work almost all the time! Your victim will forget his object and go along his merry way he might remember after 10 mins though when the hypnotic amnesia wears off.

Thats all for today randomeers! Go out there and fool your friends and remember stay random!

Friday 6/16/2011

I am going to be doing my usual show at TGIF's my goal is to use hypnosis to stick at least one girls hand to the table by the end of night! I let you know how that goes on Saturday.

Here is an extra special treat for my followers who don't just read the Saturday post!

Tyler's Quick Guide To A Confusion Induction! (ZOMG REALLY?!?!) =O

For the sake of brevity and sanity I will leave out the psychological mumbo jumbo and just tell you what to do!

Step One

Find a friend. If you don't have one then may I suggest looking at this diagram produced by the great mind of our time Dr. Sheldon Cooper

Step Two

Get you friend on a pattern of thought for example talking to them about a new movie or video game!

Step Three

In the response to a comment from your friend about said video game,using the same tone as you did in the previous statement about said video games, say "you know my wall at home isn't three feet high?

Step Four

You have just created a huge amount of confusion in your friends brain now comes the fun part tell him to do something or suggest a new topic in an athoritative tone like "Take out the trash" or "buy a pizza" or "have you been to the zoo lately?" he will respond to simple commands about 75% of the time and switch topic at least 85%

Step Five

Feel like a boss because you just did a real life jedi mind trick awww snap!

Thats my present to my dedicated readers thank you for being random in life but consistent in reading! Until next time stay random randomeers!

Thursday Update!

First day at a new restaurant if things go well I am hoping to land a permanent gig!

Last day of school in our school district so let the magic show madness begin.

Still reading pure effect its awesome!

Random Fact of the Day: Everyday more money is printed for Monopoly than the US Treasury.

Alright Randomeers! Go out there and start a Monopoly and remember always buy the orange and red square first they are the most likely landed on squares. Until next time stay Random!

Wednesday Report

Early morning magic show. Bleh.

Little kids at said show. Bleh, Bleh.

Not enough time for caffeine to kick in. Bleh,Bleh,BLEH!!!!

Random Fact (Courtesy of Amazing Fact Generator at Mental Floss because I am to Tired)

The Chinese used black pepper to cure cholera, Europeans used it as currency, and Attila the Hun demanded 3,000 pounds of the stuff in exchange for discontinuing his sacking of Rome.

Well I guess I am getting paid to do what I love even if it is not Ideal circumstances wish me luck have a great day randomeers!

Tuesday

I am working at TGIF tonight!

I am doing a show for my brothers school party

I am Trying out some new presentation from Pure Effect!

All and all Its a pretty magical day sorry for the short post but I have a show to prepare for!

Random Fact: President Kennedy was the fastest random speaker in the world with upwards of 350 words per minute.

Until tomorrow stay random Randomeers!

Monday blues Fear Not HowtoRandom is here!

Hello Randomeers I know monday isn't the best of days for alot of you but we are gonna fix that!

Follow this guide and you Monday will be sparkly happy and good!

Take a deep breath in and relax. Breath out. Think of a color that represents happiness and peace. Do you have it? Goooood. Focus on the color. Close your eyes and see that color. Imagine it slowly engulfing your whole head then neck and moving through your entire body to your feet. Start that process now. Are you back? Good next while still holding that color in your mind look at this picture.

(gaaaawwwwwwwwwwwwwh)

Imagine yourself still glowing that color as you look at the picture. Relax. Smile just as the baby of happiness smiles.

Finally I leave you with this image to remember when the dark color of Monday tries to creep back. Remembering this image glowing your color will bring you back to that happy peaceful self you desire just like the baby above.

This gentlemanly fluffball will always defend you from sadness and blues of the Monday. just imagine him surrounded in your peaceful color and all will be good.

That is my gift to you this fine day. Go out there and be happy and confident in yourself tell tomorrow randomeers!

ZOMG MEGA AWESOME RANDOM BLOG!!!!! =D

5 childhood heroes you could easily kill

with one readily available weapon

Oh superheroes they are just amazing are they not? Fighting crime, taking punches, dodging explosives and defeating overelaborate weapons! They tend to symbolize our secret hopes, fears and desires. Too bad 95% of them could be gunned down extremely easily by you. So now that you are a man or woman (we are not sexist here) (but boys are better) it’s time to rise above your childhood heroes and learn that you are more powerful than most of them.

Before we show the hit list of superhero fatalities I want to introduce you to your weapon of choice.

Take a moment to inhale the absolute beauty of this beast. This is the Barrett 50 Cal sniper rifle. The most powerful civilian legal gun in the U.S. To give you an idea of just how powerful this gun is a 9 mm handgun will put a decent quarter size hole in you. That is usually enough to drop just about every person on the planet. The Barrett here has the tendency to no make a hole at all. “What?” You say! A tiny handgun does more damage than this rifle? Well no… you see the Barrett doesn’t leave a hole because it literally tears its targets in freakin’ half!

(You before Barrett 50 Cal)

(You after Barrett 50 Cal)

Notice how there is a lot of red and no bottom and blood coming out of your eyes? That’s because the Barrett 50 Cal is a destroyer of worlds! Oh and did we mention it has a kill range of three and half miles yah little detail we forgot to add.

Ok now that we have established how awesome the Barrett is (but don’t think that will shut us up about it) let’s move on to the hit list for today.

First let’s start with an extremely beloved superhero and obvious target for destruction…

#1 Batman

Look at Batman so valiantly taking a step so determined, so focused so… easily killed by the Barrett.

While batman is strong, smart and more than capable of taking the handguns and even machine guns his enemies have with his cutting edge, bullet stopping awesome body armor he is no match for the 50 Cal. The problem is no body armor no matter how cutting edge would ever stop a Barrett. “Lies!” the Batman fan base cries out. For those of you who have cried out I give you this photo.

That my friend is tank armor about one and half feet of steel and other undisclosed bullet proof material. See how there is a gaping hole in it that is all thanks to the Barrett 50 cal.

So even if batman was wearing a tank suit he would be utterly destroyed by the Barrett let alone his silly cutting edge rubbery head. The Barrett’s bullet would go through Batman’s armor like and obese man goes through a box of Twinkies.

Batman vs. Barrett 50 Cal = Dead squishy guy with multiple personality disorder oh and those arguing that his armor would save his life but still severely injure him I refer you to the cutting a person in half fact at the top.

#2 The Flash

“Waaait wait wait!!!! Surely you are not going to argue that a gun can kill The Flash a being that moves faster than the speed of light? That would be absurd!” Actually I am going to argue that The Flash, a being who can move faster than the speed of light, can be killed by a gun easily. You see while The Flash is fast he is not always fast. He is not constantly running around and stuff. The Flash does have the tendency to stop and socialize with his friends and colleges and telly tubby collection etc. Well unbenounced to most of you the bullet the Barrett fires actually moves really freakin’ fast. Like road runner high on a mixture of PCP and meth fast. The 50 Cal bullets are flying about 3 times the speed of sound. So while The Flash is extremely fast he would not be able to react because the bullet would have killed him before anyone even heard the sound. That’s right chock that up on the awesomeness of the Barrett it kills things before you hear it! Who needs a silencer when you can’t even the hear the darn thing until it’s too late.

The Flash V.S. Barrett= Exploding Flash head!

#3 Superman

Ok now I know most of you would be happy if I could come up with a way to kill Superman but really how could I? He’s Superman after all. Most of us would give anything to blow away that stupid blank expression on mister goody two shoes but he just won’t freakin’ die! Luckily murdering the happy go lucky dork is easier than you would think. You see there is actually this cool process you can do to bullets it’s called adding a tip. They have tracer round tips that let you see where you are aiming, they have armor piercing round tips and you could have, you guessed it, a kryptonite tipped bullet! “Wait a minute there! Kryptonite is a fake element how will we get that?” Well first off if you were in the superman world it would exist but that won’t be my argument instead I will shove your argument up your superman loving nostrils. Kryptonite is real!

(Check out the nerd fest here http://blog.tmcnet.com/blog/tom-keating/news/real-kryptonite-discovered.asp)

So As you should know Superman turns into your regular old average Joe when he is in proximity with Kryptonite so we have a Kryptonite tipped bullet flying through the air faster than the speed of sound so Superman cannot hear it and react to the oncoming green banana of death it would then place the Kryptonite in the back of his stupid head along with a the huge chunk of lead. For those of you wondering what that would look like keep in mind that a watermelon is a pretty accurate representation of a person’s head and watch this. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-tTAYFSnRW4

Pretty sweet huh? (p.s. ignore the freak eating watermelon in the video)

#4 Green Lanterns

Ok I felt bad about this one considering he doesn’t even have a movie yet but a superhero is a superhero and Green Lantern is considered pretty overpowered. Not to mention his movie is coming out soon. The green Lantern lacks one key ability that makes him vulnerable to our Barrett he cannot see the future. Just in case you were wondering the only power that would beat your Barrett would be psychic powers with the ability to predict the future, invulnerability and immortality. So unfortunately the green lantern lacks all these powers therefore his head would go the way of the watermelon lets watch that again just for fun. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-tTAYFSnRW4

#5 Wolverine

Now as you may have noticed I have a thing for figuring out how to kill superheroes. Wolverine has always been my favorite thought puzzle because he is just so hard to kill the little punk just won’t stay dead. So this is the farthest stretch we will take in this article. First we will assume you are in the x men universe and have access to adamantium 50 Cal Bullets. You see a weird thing happens when a really hard object goes through another really hard object that is air tight. For a real world example let’s look at the anti-tank round. An anti-tank round is actually very small. A tank can take a lot of explosion and bullets and basically anything that isn’t harder then it. The anti-tank round gets around this problem by creating something much harder that move extremely fast remind you of anything? *cough*Barrett*cough* the anti-tank round shoots a pencil sized piece of uranium, the most dense substance on the planet, with enough propellant to launch the west side of Missouri into space. This pencil of death pokes a tiny hole in the tank but because it is moving so fast it causes what is known as “extreme pressure change” that translates into every thing that ever moved in the tank goes kablooey! That’s right it turns the air into its own bomb! Pretty sick huh? Well that’s all fine and dandy for tank killing but back to our problem at hand. The Barrett armed with adamantium 50 Cal bullets would be flying really fast as mentioned before and wolverines head is a really hard air tight object so we would have our good ol’ friend the “extreme pressure change” going on in wolverines head. Now even this isn’t enough to kill the dork because being the steroid induced freak that he is having no brain isn’t that high of a priority. So to finish the problem up you could just inject him with adamantium ala X men 2 style and then throw him into the deepest part of the ocean problem solved.

Well there is 5 of the more overpowered and considered invincible superheroes taken down by you with a Barrett 50 Cal. As you can probably tell most superheroes are easily killed by the Barrett and feel free to add your own to the list enjoy overcoming your childhood heroes and becoming way cooler in the process. Maybe this article will create a new villain called Barrett Man who just goes through each comic universe and blows away heroes if this happens I want royalties and the hero must have a striking resemblance to me!

That's it for today's epic how to random check in daily for updates and every saturday for more howto randoms until next time stay random randomeers!

Friday update!!!!!

I am going to be working at TGIF's in Brea If your in the Area come and check it out!

I Just read lesson 4 of Tarbell's course on magic and I must say that so far Tarbell is absolutely amazing! If you want to be a magician save up your cash and by this book!

If you go to TGIF and see me between 6:30-9:30pm the code phrase is "How's Tarbell Going?" and I will perform my latest trick from Tarbell.

Follow me on twitter and facebook for up to the minute information on How to Random!

Daily Randomeer Fact: A turtle is capable of breathing through it's butt!

Hello Randomeers!!!!

I am back from my long travels through the alpine mountains and zen kungfu training of china(read trying really hard to pass all my classes for the year in college) and would like to inform you of some great news! I am going to actually have a legit schedule for my blog! "What impossible?!?!" "It can't be!" Oh but it is my randomeers I my schedule will be an adaptive process but we are gonna start with this.

Mon-Fri

Quick updates about my day to day life. Plans for the day, books I am reading, movies I will watch, delicious breakfast.

Saturday!!!!!! =D

This will be a full blown awesome howto random article that you all know and love so much!

Sunday

I dunno yet guys it is Sunday after all um awesome scripture from the bible perhaps?

And don't forget to follow me if your are loving the blog so that you can have updates whenever you have your howtorandom craving that needs to be satisfied.

Random Review Time!!!!

Today I will be doing the first ever random reviews. Random Reviews will consist of well umm random reviews. I think it really fits the whole how to random theme. I will proceed to review random things that I have used, seen or done lately.

Iron Man 2 The Movie (7 out of 10)

If you liked Iron man One but want less story and more humor then go see Iron Man 2. Iron Man 2 was very entertaining but had a more humorous and action like feel to it compared to the character establishing style of Iron Man One. I personally enjoyed both the movies and feel that the both are worth seeing so go buy'em and watch them!

Luke Jermay's Seeing with the Fingertips DVD(3 out of 10)
This Magic trick was actually really bad. I was really shocked because I have come to expect the best from Luke Jermay unfortunately this trick just wasn't up to par with some of his other work such as the 7th deception and emotional intelligence to name a few. Basically the trick consist of giving the illusion of seeing the color and face of a card with the fingertips. That's it nothing else boooring oh and over complicated method as well.

Oreo Cookie Pop Tarts I had for Breakfast (2 out of 10)
Bleeeeehck! Sooooo Sweet!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am pretty sure consuming both of these pop tarts would cause a perfectly healthy 18 year old to go into insulin shock right then and there.











Myself (10 out of 10)
I am amazing probably without question the most awesome person ever.


That's me by the way.

Well that ends my awesomely cool new random review post come back next week to see learn new random cool stuff. Oh here's a hint it will involve a angry rhino, proper stance and a bear!
until next week stay random!

Kiwi Fun Facts!!!

Today on howto random you are going to learn some amazing facts facts about one of my favorite flightless birds the Kiwi!






Awwwww look at that little guy it's a scientific fact that if you don't think that the kiwi is at least a little bit adorable that you are possessed and must seek a exorcist immediately this is not a joke only you can prevent soul stealing.


Here is Kiwi fun fact #1
A kiwi get's it's name from the sound it makes when it is excited or scared. It says KEE WEE KEE WEE!!!! Thats right people this bird is like a living pokemon it says its name omg!

Kiwi Fun Fact # 2
A kiwi gives birth to the largest egg in proportion to its body. A full grown kiwi is about the size of a chicken and it gives birth to an egg the size of a ostrich egg. Let me put that into perspective for you ladies that would be like a 100 pound girl giving birth to a 65 pound baby.... Ow!!!!


Poor little kiwi! =(

Kiwi fun fact # 3 Kiwi's are believed to be under the protection of the Earth God in Native Mari belief. Therefore there feathers are very prized items as they are used in many native rituals.








( This guy says "DON'T MESS WITH MY KIWIS!")












Kiwi fun fact # 4
Kiwis get married aww!
That's right once a the cute little kiwi chooses his girl he sticks with her for life just like us!

And there you have it folks 4 kiwi fun facts for you to impress all your friends with! Remember there is know better pick up line for the ladies than hey do you know much about the adorable flightless bird known as the kiwi? well would you like to hear about them?

Check back with us next week for more random howto's and follow us on twitter so you can get up to the minute news if there are any secret early additions to howto random tell next week stay random!

And You thought i would Forget?

Hello everyone It's time for your Weekly Random How to!

Today we are going to learn how to make a dry ice bomb WHOA HOO! Nerdy Anarchy!

Here's what you you will need:
Thick Gloves ( Yes they are a must)

Dry Ice ( Available at most grocery stores ask a worker but you may have to be 18 years old to buy)

A water bottle( or two liter soda bottle )

Water ( if you can't find water then you have more to worry about than making dry ice bombs)

Alright here's how to create you own little explosive

1. First take your empty water bottle and take off the cap.

2.Take out your dry ice and break off a piece by breaking it WITH GLOVES! ( Don't Touch it!)
(now for a brief safety announcement: NEVER TOUCH DRY ICE WITH YOUR HANDS! YOU WILL GET FROST BITE AND PROBABLY LOSE YOUR FINGER ALWAYS USE THICK GLOVES)

3. Put about 5 small ice cube sized pieces of dry ice into the bottle.

4. Pour in water to about half way.

5. Quickly Screw on the top very tight! (that's what she said)

6. RUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

7. When your about 50 ft away sit and wait and wait and wait and...BANG!!!

And there you have it that's what how to make a dry ice bomb have fun and be safe and all that legal stuff about how i am not responsible for you hurting yourself or anyone or anything else and what not. Have fun and come back next week for another random how to and follow me on twitter so you can know if we have any mid week updates! Follow buttons right up in the corner so Click it!

Here's a New Post Finally!

Guess what!?! We are going to learn how to hypnotise a chicken today WooHoo!

Now you may be asking now Tyler why would i want to know how to hypnotise a chicken? Well let me ask you this why wouldn't you want to hypnotise a chicken? You could pretend your some mystic chicken whisperer or one with the animals and all that fun stuff. So with out futher ado i bring the forbidden art of chicken hypnotism!

Step 1
Get a chicken

step 2
Take said chicken a place it on its side with one wing flat agianst the ground.( make sure you don't fold its leg or wing it might hurt the poor chicken)

step 3
Take a stick (or your finger if you have practiced) and place it infront of it's eyes and quickly draw three straight lines in the dirt very quickly.

step 4
If the chicken does not go into a trance the first time wait about 5 seconds and repeat the same process with the stick (keeping the chicken on it's side the whole time) continue until the chicken has been put into a trance.

step 5
If you are successful the Chicken will lie there in a trance like state and will not move untill you make a loud noise like clapping your hands. When you clap your hands the chicken will make a "squack" then jump up walking around confused.

Step 6 The Conclusion
This will not Harm the chicken in anyway if done properly. It is used many times by farmers to settle a chicken down to give it medicine, to see if it is injuried and you know chicken things.
If I here anyone out there is hurting chickens doing this I am going to come a find you and give you the sternest talking to you have ever seen! So have fun be nice and go become a legendary chicken whisperer in your nieghborhood.

Check back next week for more random howto and check my twitter to see if i have added any new stuff throughout the week.

Happy Saturday Here's your Random Info

Today your going to learn how to make a toy bomb out of popsicle sticks and.... Nothing else thats right just popsicle sticks.

You will need five to six sticks encase you break some at first.

Heres a link to the article on how to do it.

http://www.wikihow.com/Make-a-Popsicle-Stick-Toy-Bomb

Have fun thowing sticks around and have a great saturday!

Here's some random info on this Friday!

Here's how to memorize ten things with ease just remember these rhymingwords

(the number rhymes with the word) 1 gun is One Gun

1. Gun
2. Shoe
3. Tree
4. Torn
5. Alive
6. Mix
7. Heaven
8. Hate
9. Mine
10. Hen

Now to remember a list like
eggs, milk and cheese

You do this
Step 1
in your head say 1 gun
Step 2. Imagine a funny vivid image involving eggs and a gun.
ex.( I take out a gun and shoot an egg and explodes into a million parts)
all of this should take no more than 3 to 5 seconds and now you will remember the eggs.
Just repeat these steps but change gun for the next number
ex.( for 2. milk) ( Stepping on a jug of milk with Cleats and it sprays milk everywhere!)

Remember it doesn't matter how stupid illogical or nonsensical the idea is in fact the more outrageous the statement the easier it is for you to remember it.

That's it for today have fun memorizing things like a savant and impressing your friends. see ya tomorrow!

Here is your random How to

What amazing thing will you learn today? How about how to say the alphebet backwords!
You can amaze all your friends with your neat little skill heres how.

First is this sentence
ZeXY West Virgina and Utah people are Totally Stoked and Realized the Question on the PONd is Martin Luther King Just Isn't Home Grown FED up with these remarks he said your a Cat Butt Ape.

Zexy is Sexy with at Z to remember ZYX
West Virgina and Utah is WVU
people are Totally Stoked TS
and Realized the Question RQ
on the PONd PON
is Martin Luther King MLK
Just Isn't Home Grown JIHG
FED up with these remarks FED
Cat Butt Ape CBA

So you memorized the silly sentence which will allow you to remember the alphabet much easier
Heres the alphabet backwords and forwards so you can practice You should get it with in about 10 to 15 mins.
abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz

zyxwvutsrqponmlkjihgfedcba

Have Fun, practice and make your friends think your a genius! Just tell them you have never tried this before and do say it backwards it makes it look more difficult.

See ya tomorrow with more random info!

Heres your daily random Info!

1. If you have 3 quarters, 4 dimes, and 4 pennies, you have $1.19. You also have the largest amount of money in coins without being able to make change for a dollar.
2. According to suicide statistics, Monday is the favored day for self-destruction.
3. The most common name in the world is Mohammed.
4. It's punishable by death to attempt suicide.
5. The king of hearts is the only king without a moustache.
6. Every year about 98% of the atoms in your body are replaced.
7. Every seven years virtually everything in your body has been replaced.
8. Women are 37% more likely to go to a psychiatrist than men are.
9.You burn more calories sleeping than you do watching TV.
10. The word "nerd" was first coined by Dr. Seuss in "If I Ran the Zoo."

There is your random facts I would like to thank the internet for many of those cool facts and round of applause for my brain! Make sure you come back tomorrow for more random info.

Hi everyone an now for todays Random How To!

Today we have a cool magic trick for you!

The Effect
A glass of water has pepper sprinkled on top of it. A spectator then places the tip of a tooth pick into the glass and alas nothing happens. Then the magical wizard (thats you) places the toothpick into the glass and the WAZAMOOO!!!! the pepper shoots to the edges of the glass. Step Back and bask in the glory of your amazing pepper moving skills.

The Trick
The secret lies in the tooth pick. Before the trick begins dip the end of the tooth pick in a liqud hand soap then rub it in so its invisible. Give the tooth pick to the specator with the soap side facing up. They will place the non soap side in and nothing will happen. Then secretly flip the toothpick over as you take it from the spectator. Make some magicial gestures and dip it into the pepper water and watch the pepper shoot across.

Thats it make sure you practice and make it look good before you show your friends!
And most of all Come back next week on tuesday for your new random thing to learn it might be magic it might just be some cool facts or news but one things for sure it will be fun and entertaining! see you next week!